Abnormal

The vicious cycle of the good news and the bad news in my life is relentless. Last week I had my joyous annual female exam. At the end of my appointment I was told that if I don't hear from the office it's okay because no news is good news. Well, yesterday I had to work a twelve hour shift. My husband sent me a text message, however, we were quite busy in the ER and I didn't get a chance to read the text message until 45 minutes later. He informed me that my doctor's office called and left a message on the answering machine. I was overwhelmed with fear and immediately ran to the closest phone and called the office. It was 5:06 and the answering service picked up and told me that the office closed six minutes prior to my phone call and that I would have to call the office back in the morning. Frustrated and scared, I broke down and cried. With only two hours left of my shift, our nurse manager saw how upset I was and told me to go home. I barely got any sleep last night.
I had to work again today, but I made sure to call the office as soon as it opened. I was told that my test results were positive for abnormal cells and that I need a colposcopy, and possibly a cervical biopsy, to make sure there isn't any pre-cancerous cells. They booked me for a colposcopy appointment in two weeks and told me that they will send me a pamphlet in the mail. I became furious. I was terrified with the news I was receiving and all they can do is mail me a pamphlet and rush me off the phone?!
I wiped away my tears and put on a brave face so that I could go and face my boss to let her know that I would need the day off from work on April 6th. I got the most insensitive response from her. "You need the WHOLE day off?" I couldn't believe it!! It's obvious that she doesn't care about her staff. The only thing that is important to her is that there are no holes in the schedule. Our clinical leader then said to me, "Well, I will have to look at the schedule, remind me later." Four hours later, they still hadn't looked at the schedule book. I finally asked one of them, "So am I going to be taken off the schedule that day or do I need to find my own coveraqe for a medical necessity?" I finally got my point across and my name is now removed from the schedule for April 6th.

Finally... A Letter

As I was down stairs paintint our end tables, I heard my dogs barking like crazy upstairs. I stepped outside to see if anyone was here. It was the mail man. I was hesitant to check the mail box since I was still waiting on a letter from the school and every day that it hasn't shown up, I get more and more disappointed. I decided to to check it anyways. Once again, to my disappointment I hadn't received anything from the school. As I walked back up the drive way, something in my gut told me to turn around and to my surprise the mail man had thrown the car in reverse and backed up to the mailbox again. I couldn't see over the snow bank which mailbox he was at but I did see a big yellow envelope get stuffed into one of them. I doubtful that it was for me, but I went back down anyways to check. And there it was.. a big yellow envelope from NCC admissions with my name on it. I only made it half way back up the driveway before I tore it open. All I read was "Stacie, We are pleased to inform you..." and that's when I fell to my knees and cried. It's been a long time since I have cried tears of shear happiness. People driving by must have thought I was crazy as I began throwing my hands up to the sky thanking God and all my angels resting peacefully up in Heaven! I have worked my butt off to get this far and I am beyond ready for the insane challenge of nursing school! Bring It On!!!